Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Too hard on the kids

A few days ago, Monday I think, my children and I discussed about the meaning of our names again. This came about when Camillia (kakak) practised her new Khat mechanical pencil,( ada rupanya benda ni). Her mama has never leant jawi.. may be i did when I was in std 1 or 2 and I do know how to read, merangkaklah but to write, mmg weak. Nowadays I learnt from kakak. Dulu I taught her the basic, now she's even better than me, thanks to sekolah ugama ( which I tak pernah masuk, even tho I was in Johor, went to sultan ibrahim girls school- when I was in std 1 and 2.)

Kakak's name means flower, qisty's means justice and adiks's moon. Everytime we discussed this adik will say she doesn't like her name. It is not pretty and it sounds like a boy. Her name Camarina does sound pretty but she is not happy with the meaning. Sigh...I told her that moon is a girl, that's why we have the saying pungguk rindukan bulan- owl miss the moon and P ramlee even sings about the moon.. Engkau laksana bulan...tinggi di atas kayangan..you are like the moon high in heavens... She was inconsollable.. too late kakak said. I took the easiest way out..I blamed on the father. I wanted to name her Adriana..altho it means balance , it sounds nice.. (but Dh vetoed the name.) .and I didn't want to have a common alphabet for my children.. which is what happenned now. Qamarina spelled with a C and Qistina spelled Cqistina. I was shocked when DH came back with the birth certificate of qistina. Now she has to explain to people that the C is a silent id or people will call her si -qistina. Dh and I chose kakak's name, he vetoed adik's and qisty's was commonly agreed upon altho I wanted Qaisarah.

Yesterday we brought up the subject again, and I told adik that bulan, the moon is important. When we don't have lights at night we can depend on the moon to see our surroundings. She's ok with it. I think I'll dig out articles/songs and poetry about the moon.

Sometimes I think I'm too hard on kakak. That's what my sister would say. I know kakak is very responsible, sweet and ready to help when asked or sometimes volunteer but I always thought she can do better in her studies. She stayed top ten 90% of the time, but sometimes she does careless mistakes. I know she probably missed the topic on divison, as she was sick for a whole week when the subjact was taught, and teachers in school today never checked the students work, and when they do check, they'll mark the wrong answers right and the right answers wrong without explaining. I want her to understand the basic, which to me is important as the syllabus will be more difficult as the years progress.

May be I should explain to her why sometimes I am hard on her. I want her to suceed. My nephew afiq thinks I'm too strict, mak long tu asyik marah aje but my intentions are good. Kalau bising sangat of course i marah.. sounds like a wet blanket, but kena berpada2lah. I don't want people to think my kids are indiscipline and what's wrong with instilling manners.

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